Letting Go

A few weeks ago, the kids and I were at Target. Whenever we go there, Peanut (and Pumpkin really) likes to walk through the "girl aisle" to look at the baby dolls. They both hold and look at the dolls, and when they are done we say goodbye to the dolls and put them back with their friends. This time, Peanut says that she would really really like to have a set of baby doll twins that she has been holding. I said, "honey, you have a lot of girls at home. Let's think about it a little more and we can decide later."

So we left the store, and in the car she says, "I know! I will give all of my girls, except my special girl Big, to someone who doesn't have any dolls and then I will get the twins!". So I said "wow, that would be very generous. Let's think about it and the next time we are at Target, if you still want to do that we can." Of course, I love that she is thinking this way, and I love that she is so cheery with her generosity. I'm glad that she sees our example of donating, freecycling, and sharing and wants to emulate that, but I figure she may not really mean it or know what she is doing and she needs to think on it a bit.

So this weekend, I was at a work meeting most of both days (oy) and she went to Target with daddy. By the time I stopped in for lunch, she had a new girl (not the twins) and was packing her old girls in a bag. She told me that she was ready to give them to someone without toys. I almost cried she was so pleased about the whole thing. So now I am looking for a way that we can donate them with her there to see where they will go.

Well, today when I got home from the conference, she was carefully washing Big with a baby wipe. She told me that she was getting Big all cleaned up so she could give her to someone else. Gasp! What? She can't give away Big! So I took a deep breath and said, "gosh, that's a big decision. Do you think you will miss Big?" and she said "no, I don't think so. I only want one girl." So this has yet to be resolved because I realized that I have a fear of letting Big go and I have to deal with that before I can help Peanut figure out the best plan. She has had that doll with her every day and night since she was born. I mean, she could give her away and then freak out one night about it, right?

I think I will just let it sit for a while, wait for her to bring it up again and see what happens in the meantime. I'm so glad to be raising a generous daughter, and one who is clearly teaching me how to let go.